Days 122 and 123 - Reaction

Time for Part 3 of my little blog mini-series about events and their impacts. I wrote this 6 years ago, and haven't changed it for this reblog - a lot of it still stacks up. Hope to be back to new blogs from tomorrow :-) 

I've already looked at two critical elements for determining the overall effect that a particular event might have, namely the context and the timing. I now want to look at the third important element, possibly the most vital of them all, which is reaction. 

In terms of our ability to affect and control the impact of events we have a much more limited influence on timing and context. Yes we can anticipate events and try to alter the profile of an impact, so to speak, but we generally have very little control over these aspects. 

Reaction on the other hand, is a different kettle of fish. 

The impact of an event is often only as important or as unimportant as WE choose to make it. I'm not saying shitty things don't happen or that everything can be fixed with a "can do" attitude. I'm just saying that often our reaction to an event can be the most important factor in determining the impact or severity of that event. Perspective and a hint of positivity can go a long way. 

It is difficult sometimes obviously. Not everything can be dealt with positively, and not everything should be. There are certain events for which there is no rational and logical approach. Some things need to be cried about, some things ARE the end of the world and some things should be taken seriously. But it is important to always remember that your reaction is one of the things that define an event and often a sense of proportion can be lost when reactions are, well, "poor". 

I have been terrible in that past at this. My reaction to certain things is a big part of the reason I am where I am. There were things that, looking back now, I got terribly terribly wrong. Events that were difficult were made impossible and events that were trivial were made difficult. Situations that should have been easy to solve became difficult and my life ended up taking a path it probably didn't have to. 

The most important thing is to learn to recognise HOW your behaviour and reaction to an event can affect its impact, even after the event has happened. This is not something that is particular common in nature where cause tends to lead to effect with no place for post-event "control". 

But we have the ability and the power to shape that effect, to make it what we need it to be and not just a function of the factors which caused it. This is why I think our reaction to things is even more important than the timing or the context. We can have a direct influence on things (both for good and for bad) and I think too many people don't understand that. 

Or maybe they sub-consciously don't enjoy the responsibility. A lot of people are too quick to complain when everything goes against them without realising that a lot of the time (not all of the time I grant you) their reaction to things can actually greatly influence the net impact. Maybe they like being able to blame something rather than face the (sometimes difficult) choice of what can be done about it. 

Sometimes it can feel like the world is spiralling away from you and there is nothing you can do about it. You feel trapped, isolated and complete helpless. But that doesn't have to be the case all the time. 

There are things we can do about it, things we can control which can help with managing the situations. Positivity and an understanding that WE have a much greater say in things than we sometimes believe is a small step of the way. And if we also become better at finding a sense of perspective and taking some responsibility for events then I genuinely think we can make a difference. 

So always remember, events are shaped by causes - but they are often shaped just as importantly by how WE react to them and how we choose to allow the consequences and impacts to manifest.

Till tomorrow, Tom

Day 121 - Context

Part 2 of my little mini-series concerning events and their impacts. Last time I talked about the importance of timing and how that can influence the overall actual impact of an event. But often just as important as timing is the context of an event, the background against which that event might take place.

Things are rarely black and white. It is rarely the case that something is completely one thing or the other. Shades of grey permeate all aspects of our life - not THOSE shades of grey though, I'll be steering well clear of those! And it is the same with events, the context is so important to determining the impact which a particular occurrence will ultimately have.

The first thing to remember with events is that the impact will be inherently different for all observers of that event. For example, the impact of a train delay is inextricably linked to your other travel plans. A minor train delay can have essentially one of three major impacts (1) it might make you late for your next connection - negative impact (2) your previous connection was late but the delay has allowed you to make this connection - positive impact (3) you don't have a connection - neutral impact. One event, three contexts and so three net impacts.

But there are other scenarios in which context is vital. Some occurrences of the "same" event can have vastly different impacts dependent on the other conditions and criteria. For example, losing your keys is usually much more of a concern when you are trying to get into somewhere as opposed to getting out. The critical event is essentially identical but the impact is significantly less in one scenario than the other.

We have to be careful to take context into account when analysing an event and the impact it is having. The same event won't always have the same impact. The severity of the impact is also subject to the context - we are back again at shades of grey rather than a black and white view of things.

One of the things I know I have been poor at in the past is overreaction - overplaying the impact of something without stopping to really think about the context. Treating things as a "disaster" without really taking the time to actually consider what the impact really was.

So it is key to take a step back from events and assess the impact properly. Don't just assume that the impact is always the same for similar events and try to consider the positive contextual aspects as well as concentrating on the fact that it could be a disaster. And also think about the scale of the impact, as it is rarely at one end or the other.

I touched last week on events in which time and context were both key factors in determining an overall impact and in truth it is more often the case that the impact is a function of both of these rather than just one. Rarely do you have time without context (or vice-versa) and the interplay between the two is important in determining the overall impact.

Timing and context are both inherent factors to an event and you often don't have a significant amount of real influence on these. Usually the best you can do is try to prepare and to minimise the negative impact from the event. This leads on to the factor that I want to talk about next time, the reaction to an event.

In many ways this is the key element, as this is the one that you have the most control over and the one that you can manipulate with a much higher degree of freedom. So in the next blog I will look at this, at how the event impact can actually be shaped by what takes place AFTERWARDS, rather than before and during.

Till tomorrow, Tom 

Days 113,114,115,116,117,118,119,120 - Timing

8 days without posting. It is fair to say I have well and truly lost my mojo. A bad combination of missing home, struggling with work and suffering physically is all adding up to giving me no desire to share my thoughts - and to be honest my thoughts have pretty much dried up. 

But I want to get back into this. When I was feeling positive earlier in my trip it was because I was blogging, because I was getting my brain emptied regularly and making sure I didn't fester. Sure a lot more has gone wrong since then, but that wasn't supposed to be the point of this. The point of this was to be forward thinking. And even though nothing any politician has said in the past 3 weeks has convinced me we are getting out of this anytime soon, looking forward is the theme from now one.

Now, I've got a really busy 2-3 days coming up so the next three blogs are old ones. But it'll get me into the habit of doing things regularly and then hopefully I'll have drummed up a few new ideas by then. 

So back to June 2014 we go. I was a mere two months away from meeting the light of my life. So much has changed since then, but I think the below is still relevant, particularly with the events that have been thrown and me over the last 6 months.

Till tomorrow, Tom

***************************

Events simply happen, with little thought on their part to the impact. This is a fact of life, and one which certainly keeps things interesting for us all!

But events on their own are simply things that happen, it is the IMPACT of the events which is important. The impact is key and this can be significantly altered dependent on three things: 1) the timing of the event, 2) the context of the event and 3) the reaction to the event.

So I thought I'd do a little mini-series looking at these three things and, probably more importantly, the interaction between them. No idea how it'll go so bear with me if you can!

So then, Timing. 

You often hear the phrase "Timing is Everything". And, like all cliches, the reason you often hear it is because it is often correct. The timing of an event/incident is of critical importance to its impact.

The impact of the arrival of an unexpected bill for example may depend critically on whether you have just been paid. Timing.

Say I am at work and a calculation I have done needs to be re-checked. This is a vastly different scenario dependent on whether it needs to be issued today or in a month. Timing.

Those of you who know about the Buncefield Fire will appreciate the importance of timing in this incident. A series of explosions and their resulting fires caused signficant damage to 20 large fuel tanks as well as numerous buildings on site. There were no deaths and only 2 significant injuries. Why? The event occured at 6am in the morning so the site was mainly uninhabited. Timing.

So it becomes very apparent, very quickly, that the impact of an event is crucially and fundamentally dependent on the timing of the event itself. And this becomes important in managing these events and limiting these impacts. You often can't do anything about the event itself, it'll happen regardless. But you CAN influence its impact if you can control the timing of it, or at least understand the importance of the timing and put steps in to mitigate.

Often I feel we channel our energies in the wrong place when it comes to events. Instead of trying to stop them happening, sometimes (and I stress SOMETIMES) the trick might be to accept that it will happen and put the steps in place to limit the impact by controlling/understanding the timing.

But on the other side of the coin, I know it often isn't that simple. Timing is critical but it can also be heavily linked to the context of an event too. Take, for example, football and the oft-stated phrase "a good time to score". This is implying that (although all goals are worth the same) the timing of a goal is a critical factor in its importance. No doubt this is true in some situations, but the context is important too. A last minute penalty is worth a bit more at 0-0 in a World Cup Final than at 3-0 down versus the Dog and Duck on a Sunday.

So the interaction between timing and context is important here, and this is something I want to touch on in a bit more depth in a later part of this series. Tomorrow I will look at the second factor which can determine the impact of an event, the Context. Hopefully enough of you will be back!

Days 92 to 95 - Beauty and the Beast

I'll be honest, this week has sucked. 

It's just been one of those weeks where every little thing seems to be pushing my buttons. Age is obviously just a number (and your mentality plays a huge part in what that number means) but I can't deny that turning 40 is starting to make me take stock of where my life is and where I am going. And it hasn't always been pretty reading. 

Sometimes this beast which lurks amongst all of us is given too much to feed off. Too. much negativity, too much regret.

I often wonder whether I've fully taken advantages of the opportunities I've been given, have I fully challenged myself to be the best I can? Some days the answer is yes, others it is a resounding no. There is definitely a sense of frustration that all of us feel about sometimes wishing we could go back in time and do things differently, knowing what we know now. 

But on the flip side, everything in my life has gotten me to Katie - to being a daddy. That is the most beautiful thing in my life, and something which I am striving to find elsewhere too.

I read an article some 6 years ago on the BBC News website talking about the relationship between mathematics and beauty (http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/science-environment-26151062). It talks generally about the fact that seeing certain mathematical functions and expressions can elicit similar brain functions to looking at artistic masterpieces. Back then it got me thinking about the notion of beauty and things that are beautiful - and it resonates today still with me.

The BBC article mentions one equation in particular - Euler's identity - which perfectly relates five of the most fundamental mathematical constants (0, 1 e, i and π) and three of the basic arithmetic operations (addition, multiplication and exponentiation.

Euler's Famous Identity

I remember the first time I ever understood the dichotomy of this. The contrast of fundamental mathematical and practical simplicity alongside the less tangible sense of wonder and beauty that comes with finding something so perfect, so pure. It triggers curiosity, and curiosity can be a wonderful way to find what you are looking for.  

THAT is what beauty in this world is about. It is about seeing, hearing, touching, tasting or smelling something which elicits pure, raw emotions. Beautiful things stop you in your tracks, they fundamentally change the way you think about things and they make you smile. It is not a superficial thing at all but a much more primal and instinctive reaction.

One of the best things about this world is how much there is out there which has the potential to do those things to us. We shouldn't be striving for possessions or power but rather searching for those moments, those sensations of awe and wonder which we all have the capacity to feel. They don't cost anything to feel and they transcend all barriers. 

And beauty is different for every single one of us, that is what make life so interesting and so full of variety. So get out there and keep your senses open. Don't close your mind to anything and just be alert for those moments that take your breath away, they can come in so many different forms. And when they do come, appreciate them for everything they are. It is better than listening to the beast which lurks there too.

Till tomorrow, Tom

Day 64 - The answer is.....

......42. Well, according to Douglas Adams's seminal work The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy it is. The problem then switches to one of finding the question that fits this answer! Another of Adams's quotes from the same work goes further and implies that humans are, in fact, missing the point of life somewhat:

"On the planet Earth, man had always assumed he was more intelligent than dolphins because he had achieved so much - the wheel, New York, wars and so on - whilst all the dolphins had ever done was muck about in the water having a good time. But conversely, the dolphins had always believed they were more intelligent then man - for precisely the same reasons."

Does Adams have a point here? Have the dolphins, in fact, got this whole existence thing spot on? Life is so staggeringly complex, impossible to work out and completely beyond normal levels of comprehension that it might simply be a better approach to not get too caught up with the why's and wherefores and simply make sure we live our lives to the fullest with the cards we are dealt.

Life has been around way before any of us, and will be around long afterwards too. It doesn't really care whether we understand it and frankly we would probably only find an answer devoid of context anyway. Every time I get close to understanding my life something comes by and blindsides me so applying that to the whole of existence seems and coming out on top seems unlikely.

I do feel that sometimes we worry too much and can tie ourselves in knots trying to understand why things happen the way they do. In fact I have it on good authority that this is one of my abundant character flaws! It can be difficult for sure, but is the best approach actually too just accept the fact that the answer IS 42, the question is unknown and you might as well enjoy the ride?

It is often said that the journey is more important than the destination, and nowhere is this truer than life itself. I know it is our human nature which pushes us to question, explore and understand - and striving for knowledge in itself is no bad thing (something I always encourage Katie to try and do). But maybe there is a line to be drawn, a point beyond which it is not worth pushing for fear of growing insanity taking over.

We often spend so long looking for answers that we often either forget the question we asked or, more likely, would have no idea what to do with the answer if we found it, In that respect, may mucking around in the water having a good time is precisely what we should be doing. Well played dolphins, well played indeed.

Till later, Tom

ps- I know I'm back behind again. I'm getting there!

Day 59 - Round and Round

Have you ever noticed that the same ideas keep coming round in your head? The same thoughts, the same concepts. Often they are subtly different but sometimes it is just the same thing looping round and round and round. I came to write my blog tonight and the first five topics I thought about have all been done at some point in the not too distant past.

It's not as if the world is short of things to write about either. I just seem to keep returning to the same things over and over again. I suppose it is the human brain equivalent of some kind of feedback loop, once you start thinking about one thing you are always drawn back to it. There is one particular drinking game (the Name Game) - some of the rules have been semi-nicked from here - that showcases this phenomenon quite accurately.

Everybody sits in a circle and someone starts by saying the name of someone famous, or pretty close to being famous as far as those people are concerned.

The next person says a name that starts with the first letter of the last name of the previous name. For example,

 
    Mel Brooks
        |
        Bart Simpson
             |
             Steve Redgrave
                   |
                   Richard Burton 
                           |
                           Bill Clinton
                                |
                                Chris Brown

If a player can't think of a name IMMEDIATELY, they must drink for the DURATION until they can think of an appropriate name.

Now you'd be amazed how difficult it is at this point to think of some whose first name begins with a B and who isn't either Bill Clinton or Bart Simpson! Why? Why does the brain get locked into this loop whereby all you can think of is TWO people in the whole world whose first name begins with a B.

I'm sure there is some very technical psychological terms for this behvaiour but, short of that, I'm going to describe this as a teeny bit bizarre. The mind has got locked into a weird loop and (maybe as you are under pressure and/or quite boozed) it reverts back to its short term memory and tries to drag stuff up from there. Maybe I'm talking crap, but it seems a pretty reasonable explanation!

Well that is pretty much what has been going on in my head everytime I've tried to think of a blog post recently. I'm putting it down to the need for a holiday but who knows what is actually going on up there. All I know is that I can guarantee within a few weeks I'll be thinking "why don't I write a blog about how difficult it is to write original posts". The whole cycle will happily repeat itself over and over it seems.

On the plus side I have just about managed to write a blog post about the fact that I can't think of anything new to write about, so maybe the old grey matter isn't as useless as I'm giving it (lack of) credit for!

Till later,
Tom

Day 51 - The Human Spirit

Having already posted once today I was scratching around for something to write about today. I wanted something bright and breezy as, well to be honest, I've had a few beers and a bite to eat and I'm feeling sleepy! Messing about on YouTube I found myself - yup that's right, me. 5 and a bit years I did a thing called an Ignite Talk.

The basic gist of this event is that you get 20 slides over 5 minutes to talk about any topic of your choosing. Each slide is on for 15 seconds before automatically advanced so you have to keep it snappy and interesting. My topic of choice? The Many World Championships of Finland.

6 years ago (I think - Poppy was born when I was away and I think she is 6 #baduncle) I spent about 2 months in Finland with my work. 

As I've already talked about in a previous blog, I love to absorb as much of the culture as possible when I'm away - and it was this that lead me to discover just how many world championship events Finland hosts. Included amongst those "sports" where you can be crowned world's best are: Mobile Phone Throwing, Mosquito Squashing, Swamp Football, Air Guitar and (my personal favourite) Wife Carrying!

It seems to be an interesting function of humankind that we can make a sport (or certainly an event) out of almost anything. Even the most humdrum activities can be "jazzed up" by making a competition of it. Toe Wrestling for example is now an event with its own world championships.

I love the human spirit when it comes to these kind of things. It reminds us all not to take things too seriously and to remember that most of the stresses we bring upon ourselves (especially in the Western world) are relatively insignificant in the grand scheme of things. So next time you find yourself faced with a task or a situation that you aren't too keen on, my advice is pretty simple - invent a "World Championships" for that task and bask in the glory of success when you beat all comers.

Of course the trick is to find something that no-one else can beat you at, but that is probably all part of the fun. I remember being a child and wanting to be World Champion at something. I thought that opportunity had passed me by but I have new hope now; there is bound to be something I'm better than everybody else at! Surely?!

Till tomorrow,

Tom

Day 41 - Running late

I appreciate it might be almost Day 42 for you guys back home. But in my defence I had a long week, followed by a late flight. I got home at 10pm and had to set my alarm for 4:45am so I could get half an hour talking to Katie! She and Nat are so busy (especially at weekends) that if I want to catch Katie then I have limited windows. 

And of course I was greeted by a smiling face right? Was I hell! Little Miss Moody-Ass-11-going-on-13 was in full effect!! A gentle reminder that timing is crucial, young girls don't like to be distracted from Tik-Tok and parenting is a game you can at best draw at for a good 5-6 years in the middle. Hats off to all those that do it, either their own or with back-up.

As I fully intend to do another blog later this evening  think I'll cheat again and delve into my box of previous blogs. I found this one, from almost exactly 6 years ago. It talks a bit about time, but also place. And I think it has some relevance still, particularly with the very nature of this blog being related to relocation/dislocation. Hope you enjoy.

Have you ever noticed how people never seem to be in the "right time" or "right place"? How often do you hear someone say they wish they had lived 200 years ago or 1000 years in the future, or the other side of the world? It is a very odd phenomenon that afflicts a significant number of us. But why do we do this, why do we frequently overlook our current existence and covet a different one in which to live out our lives? 

Personally I know I am just as guilty as others of this. The books and films I enjoy are generally not contemporary and those that are set in the present are often far from here.

Which is odd really because there is no obvious logical reason why this desire/drive exists? Is it perhaps an extension of the "grass is always greener" situation or is it something more basic than that? Are we humans simply that way inclined, always looking to be somewhere (or "somewhen") else?

Or is it that we like to imagine how are lives could be different IF we were somewhere or somewhen else? It could be that we prefer to counter our mundane (as they often seem to us) lives by pretending to be back in a "golden" time period, or off somewhere idyllic, or in the future which we can sub-consciously shape to our own preferences and make it the ideal place to live.

Whatever the reason I sometimes wonder if we are missing out on something by looking so desperately to be anywhere else. All around us there are fantastic experiences to be had, places to see, people to meet. And they are all within touching distance.

We don't need to imagine or dream about being elsewhere, we just need to look more closely around us and see that, actually, you are quite possibly exactly when and where you should be.

Till later, Tom

Day 40 - Another old one

Another day, another really long one. So once again I am shamelessly pilfering a previous blog. It's a light one, and probably not that interesting really. But I'm mentally beat and I need to learn some Spanish! I promise tomorrow to write something new - probably. Yeah I should get a chance in the airport as I am waiting to travel home. 

This one was focusing on things which I called Unbreakable Laws of the Universe (ULotU). Things that no-one can really explain but are just true. Everyone inherently knows them to be.

Barriers around things

This idea is borrowed (stolen) from the great Douglas Adams but I think it certainly still holds water. Adams (when designing the “rules” for a game called Brockian Ultra Cricket which was briefly mentioned in his Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy series) came up with this as a theory;            

 

Put your team and the opposing team in a large field and build a high wall round them. The reason for this is that, though the game is a major spectator sport, the frustration experienced by the audience at not actually being able to see what's going on leads them to imagine that it's a lot more exciting than it actually is. A crowd that has just watched a rather humdrum game experiences far less life-affirmation than a crowd that believes it has just missed the most dramatic event in sporting history.

 

When I first wrote this blog we were having some security turnstiles installed at work and no-one really paid much attention UNTIL a barrier was constructed around the area where they were being installed – suddenly everyone was trying to get a sneak peak and see what was going on, just in case it was the most interesting thing ever and they wanted to make sure they didn’t miss it. People just can’t help themselves. Obviously it’s not just the male gender that fall for this, but we seem to be more interested on the whole.

So ULotU Rule #1 – To make something more interesting, make it harder for people to see clearly what it is

 

Toilet Etiquette

This is something all men understand innately. I was certainly never taught this, its just there in my mind. The following diagram is a representation of the Men’s toilets at my work – the numbers correspond to the “correct” filling order.

Any disruption from the filling order (e.g. someone taking #6 when the rest of the toilets are empty) will cause great consternation if a second person comes in to use the facilities for example. Can’t explain it but if you show this to most guys I would expect you would get a very small amount of debate (if any). 

So ULotU Rule #2 – There is a way to “fill” any toilet facility. Its like the offside rule, it’s bloody difficult to explain to the uninitiated but it is unavoidable

Guys feel like James Bond when in Black Tie (i.e. DJ with bow-tie)

Sorry but we do. He’s cool and everyone in black tie wants to look like him and be him. If you are in a black suit and black tie then you start humming the Reservoir Dogs theme tune and deciding whether you want to be Mr Blonde, Mr White or Mr Orange. Obviously no-one want to be Mr Pink and Mr Purple is on another job.

 

So ULotU Rule #3 – When you wear Black Tie you could actually be James Bond. Black suit and black tie equals Reservoir Dogs.

 

It is almost impossible to use a lightsaber (or anything of that shape) without making a “woosh".

Ewan Macgregor famously added his own sound effects during the lightsaber battles he filmed for Episode 1 (until the crew politely pointed out that they could do that in sound editing later). If a fully trained professional actor can’t help himself then what chance do mere mortals have! 

Additionally, its amazing how many everyday things can be easily utilised to make a perfect lightsaber in order to be able to carry out the “whooshing” – mops, long-cardboard tubes, cricket stumps etc….

 

So ULotU Rule #4 – Lightsabers are cool. Making noises with them is even cooler

 

There are many, many other rules of men which have been talked about in great detail across vast swathes of the internet and other assorted media outlets (these things called books that I’ve heard so much about) so I won’t bore you anymore.

For the record (a) once the barrier was removed, nobody cast a glance at the turnstiles at work (b) if you do use a cricket stump for a lightsaber, check your clearances first because trying to explain to the groundsman why there is a shiny new hole in his recently redecorated changing room is neither a fun nor easy experience!

Till tomorrow, Tom

Day 38 - Tips for Travellers

It's 2030 and my flight leaves Baton Rouge for Houston at approximately 0530 tomorrow morning. So already I'm at somewhere around 6 hours maximum sleep, if I go now. Right now. This second. So for that reason I am going to shameless reblog my second ever post - from October 26 2011! 

Back when this was a blog about me. When I wrote this I was yet to be married, yet to be divorced, yet to begin my career in any real sense. My daughter was only 3 and we had no idea our paths would cross. So much has changed, but I think this blog may still be relevant. It was called Travel Tips for the Jet Setters. Enjoy.

• Sometimes at security checks I have been asked to remove my belt and sometimes I haven't. Luck says that you will ONLY be asked to remove your belt if you have baggy jeans on which are relying 100% on said belt to keep them up.

• NEVER EVER EVER try to humourously engage immigration staff at US airports. Particularly when you have a UK passport although you were born in Germany (apparently that means you are probably a member of the Third Reich). Also don't ask the immigration staff  "what would you recommend?" when they ask you "what is your reason for entering the US?". In my defence it had been a 10 hour transatlantic flight sat between an asthmatic elephant and a screaming child.

• No matter how many times you've seen an episode of (for example) Family Guy, you WILL laugh like a tit at the really funny bit when watching it on a plane, resulting in (a) large numbers of people looking at you strangely (b) potential spillage of drink or food when you knee the tray table in your amusement.

• It ALWAYS rains upon arrival in Manchester, ignore whatever the captain says and keep your jacket with you at all times. On the off chance it isn't raining when you disembark, it will be when you finally leave the airport.

• If you can get them, the best economy class seats are generally at the front of the cabin sections by the emergency door. For extra leg room (and no-one in front moving constantly during the flight and disturbing your drink/meal) you have to agree to be the one to open the emergency door if you have crashed, which seems an excellent trade. Curiously you need to be able to speak English to sit in these (or maybe the native language of the flight) but not sure why that is relevant. A big red arrow showing either a clockwise or an anti-clockwise turn doesn't really need a label does it?!
• Or try to swing Business Class!

• Budget airlines are cheap for a reason. The food/drink/service/entertainment is shoddy because you basically haven't paid for it - prepare for this and stock up with whatever you can before hand or you will be crying when you have to pay £4 for 10 Pringles and a slightly moist Mars bar.

• Always look as if you know where you are going when you are in a city that is new to you. You can still consult a map (although preferably not every 2 seconds) and still look at road/street signs, but don't walk around gormlessly looking confused. I suppose there is nothing wrong with this, you just look very, very silly.

• Don't fall into the (generally) British trap of speaking loudly and slowly at a foreign person without checking if they speak English first. It always helps to learn a bit of the language for where you are going - the most important phrase to learn however is "I'm sorry - I only speak a little <insert language here>, do you speak English?" because I can guarantee that whatever little you manage to learn will be woefully inadequate if the response comes back in the native language.

• Do your research. Don't turn up in a city on one of its holidays or in the middle of a festival/carnival without planning it. I mistakenly did this in Budapest (I think) once, I arrived on a Tuesday into the main train station and asked when the next bus to my hotel was. Friday was the helpful response, same for the trams and trains. About £50 later my 3 mile taxi journey was complete.

• When camping, don't camp on an ants nest. They get really arsey and have been known to break into your tent to voice their displeasure.

• Also, your tent probably isn't waterproof - but you won't find out until it rains. If it is waterproof, don't leave it unzipped. 

Till tomorrow, Tom

Slight change of plans

Tonight was supposed to Part 3 of my little mini-series but unfortunately something has come up so I won't get to writing a new post today. I'll do it tomorrow instead :-)

To fill the gap I'm going to cheat MASSIVELY and re-use a post from a good few years ago. I've seriously been neglecting my live music fix this year and am hoping I should be able to get to a few gigs before Christmas if I get my ass in gear. To try and inspire me, I dug out my "best gigs I've ever been to" post and have shamelessly copied it here. I think it is still relevant and hopefully will get you thinking about yours.

#8 Madness – Nynex Arena, Manchester (late 1990s)

My very first live music gig (if you don’t count classical music spectaculars at Tatton Park). Madness seem to have the ability to put anyone in a good mood; that upbeat jazzy ska style just gets your feet moving. Despite not knowing that many of their tunes at the time I went with a few mates, mainly as it wasn’t that expensive and I figured it was as good a way to spend a Friday evening as anything else on the table. By the end I was a fully converted Madness fan and the love affair with live music had begun. I saw them the at V- 2012 and they hadn't lost a step. Not a bad place to start.

#7 Newton Faulkner – The Lowry, Manchester (2010)

Occasionally an act comes along that you simply need to experience live in order to appreciate how talented they are and to get a better understanding of what they and their music are all about. Newton Faulkner is that guy. First things first, he is good, very good. He is even better live. It is not just the music but the whole ambience and good old fashioned “down-to-earthiness” he brings which makes him so appealing. 
He is busy (playing almost every sound himself via a bizarre arrangement of contraptions), he is conversational throughout and he appears to be having just as much fun playing to the audience as the audience is watching him. The Lowry was the perfect setting too, feeling slightly more intimate than an outdoor stage or big venue yet with exceptional acoustics which really enhanced the full range of sounds and tones Newton brings. Oh and he looks a bit like Sideshow Bob!

#6 The Proclaimers – T in the Park (2003)    

Sometimes a good gig can be made as much by the company you are in as the band themselves. T in the Park 2003 was a festival that will forever live in the memory; I have more stories to tell from those 3 days deep in the countryside than from every other festival put together. This day particularly there was a buzz in the air, it was 30+ degrees and the sun was shining. 
Mid afternoon found a group of about 6-8 of us standing at the 2^nd stage at T in the Park surrounded by thousands of (mainly) Scots dancing like a bunch of absolute monkeys to I’m Gonna Be (500 miles). We danced like that for the best part of an hour, basking in the simple pleasures of good old-fashioned tunes you can sing your heart out to and the after effects of too much Tennents, Buckfast and general revellery from the night before.

#5 Ocean Colour Scene – Manchester Apollo (2011)

I’m a big believer that going to see a band live should be a completely different experience when compared to listening to an album by yourself at home. It’s a vastly contrasting environment and the last thing you want is to simply hear the album as you would at home. EXCEPT this time. Ocean Colour Scene’s “Moseley Shoals” Tour was the antithesis of everything I’ve just said, and it was brilliant. Despite knowing (for the first ¾ of the gig anyway) exactly what was coming next the sense of excitement was still there throughout. 
From the opening bars of Riverboat Song, through Day We Caught the Train and The Circle and on into some of the lesser known gems towards the end of the album, this was an example of how to keep it simple and yet it was an absolute triumph. Sometimes, when an album is this good, just play the damn thing from start to finish. Oh, and the “extra” tunes after the break didn’t exactly let the side down either.

#4 Foo Fighters – Leeds Festival (2002)

Nirvana were ones of those bands that I was generally aware of without really knowing a great deal of their stuff. Every knew Kurt Cobain and his story but a couple of years before I’d caught a few songs from a band called the Foo Fighters lead by someone that one of my friends described as “the REALLY talented one out of Nirvana”. It was decent enough and between that 2000 show and this one I’d bought everything they had ever recorded and was fully ready for the follow-up. 
What I wasn’t ready for was Dave Grohl’s energy, enthusiasm and considerable talent. Make no mistake, this is no drummer who ended up leading a band by a curious set of circumstances, Dave Grohl is as good a front man as there is out right now. He is multi-talented (just check out the Foo’s first album where he plays everything himself), a real showman and a seemingly genuinely likeable guy who doesn’t appear to take himself too seriously, no doubt influenced by the torment from seeing Cobain destroyed by the same thing. 
On this night he and the band were simply magnificent and this was a tour de force of live grunge/soft rock. From the opening choppy guitar work at the start of All My Life through classics such as Monkey Wrench, Learn to Fly and My Hero to the sensational encore consisting of the acoustic, haunting Tired of You and the magnificence of Everlong this was breathtaking.

#3 The Prodigy – V Festival (2005)

Three years after seeing a pretty disappointing Prodigy set at Leeds Festival I didn’t have massive hopes for this gig but the alternative was the Scissor Sisters and (with all due respect) there wasn’t much of a conversation to be had. What a decision. Part of Prodigy’s 10 year celebrations, this was simply mind-blowing from the opening notes through 90 minutes of bedlam to a jaw-dropping finish on Smack My Bitch Up and Outer Space.  Every band member was on top form and the razor sharp performances still bring a tingle all these years later. Fireworks were going off, the whole place absolutely buzzed from start to finish and words really can’t articulate what it felt to be in that crowd that night.

#2 Muse – Lancashire CCC (2010)

I am an unashamed Muse fan. I have everything they have ever released and have seen them numerous times in concert spanning the years and all the studio albums. Of all the Muse gigs though, something about this early September evening at Old Trafford CC will live in the memory for a long time. I was expecting great things and was not disappointed. As the sun set over the stage; the explosion of noise, sound and vibrancy started and didn’t stop for nigh on 2 hours. 
Matt Bellamy’s haunting voice transcends the whole thing but these guys really are a perfect combination of power and finesse and are masters of performance. Song after song was performed to perfection with the patented Muse touches; think long solos, huge sing-a-longs, expertly choreographed lights/effects and a playlist picked to perfection with the ideal balance of new, old, slow and fast. This was a band at the absolute height of their powers.

#1 Oasis – Reading Festival (2000)

My first festival, first night headliners, pouring rain, electrical thunderstorm going off all around the venue. This was, quite simply, the greatest set or gig I have ever had the privilege to witness. It was mind-blowing, nerve-tingling and almost life-alteringly good. They’ve had their ups and downs but on this August night in a field in Southern England, Oasis were simply transcendent. This was live music at its absolute pinnacle, nothing else seemed to matter except to be there and soak in every single minute. They were simply epic from start to finish. 
Every time I hear Don’t Look Back in Anger my whole body shivers as I remember this night. Noel barely sang a word of it; he didn’t need to as the crowd sang it for him. Champagne Supernova would have lifted every roof off every venue in the world bar none and the sing-along to Wonderwall could probably have been heard around the globe. For a 20 year old (at the time) Mancunian this was seminal. Possibly I will never see or hear the like again but to have witnessed something like this just once is enough.

So there you have it. 8 amazing gigs for 8 very different reasons. Hopefully that has inspired you to get out and get listening to some live music, it really is the way forward.

Till tomorrow,
DT